So for those of you who dislike "Pokémon" and/or have no interest in it, this is going to be a long-ass post.
For the rest of us, I like Pokémon, you like Pokémon, the fifth generation games are confidently expected to arrive in America sometime this coming late winter/early spring. They are already out in Japan, so, naturally, there are now several small craters where the Pokémon-centric areas of the internet once stood. This is because some fans could not wait a few months and imported copies of "Pokémon Black/White" to play. We're not going to make fun of them, however, (a) because that kind of peculiar glass-houses-and-stones nerd behavior is reprehensible and (b) because these crazy obsessed fans have been nice enough to dole out game information for the rest of us.
Since Nintendo is being a big meanie about screenshots and other graphics, sadly I will not be posting pictures. But here are some of the more intriguing spoilers:
The Plot is NOT "Vision of Escapoké" or whatever. There was a hilarious-in-hindsight rumor that popped up a few weeks before the game was released that "Black/White" was going to be the "Darker and Edgier" Pokémon game that a vocal chunk of the fandom has desired for years. (For some damn reason, some fans want a "mature" version of "Pokémon". Which is a game series in which a ten year old child is put in charge of beings with phenomenal elemental powers. And where this one guy wanted to reboot the entire universe and got banished to the realm of a cosmic horror dragon thing as punishment.) The plot was said to involve a character that was "a half-Angel", or a cross between a human and a Pokémon, or something else that's terribly... well, the word that's coming to my mind is "fanfiction-y". Seems this isn't the case, thank Arceus.
The Plot is, However, Marginally Different in "Black" and "White". Somewhat similar to "Ruby/Sapphire", the Not-Team-Rocket you battle depends on the game. In "Black", it's smelly hippies. In "White", it's corrupt corporate executives. There is also a unique area in each game; Back has a city and White has a forest. Furthermore, certain characters will only appear in one game or the other. The identity of the final gym leader, for example, depends on what game you play. I doubt the plot will be all that different in practice, really.
There is an Online Area Called the "Dream World", and in it, it is Possible to Find Pokémon with Alternate Abilities. This is the most interesting because we know so little about it. The reason is that the Dream World servers have been down for weeks after the release of "Black/White". Yes, the "Dream World" finally takes "Pokémon" out of the Nintendo and onto the Internet. About the only thing I know about it is that you are able to find Pokémon with different Abilities. (Aside: This is about where I wonder if anyone not familiar with the games got this far.) Some of these new abilities have the potential to make certain older Pokémon completely broken. Vulpix, for example, gets Drought. Yes, Groudon's Drought, the permanent Sunny Day weather effect. And little Polywag gets the permanent Rainy Day effect Drizzle, which used to be exclusive to Kyogre. Daaaaaamn...
We Finally Have a Maniraptor Pokémon. OK, so Aaken and Aakeosu are Microraptors, which leaves the pre-teen kid in me a little disappointed. And it boggles the mind that it took five generations. But still, honest-to-goodness 'raptor Pokémon! Other Pokémon include an electric unicorn, a giant psychic amoeba, a fiery Daruma doll, a cross between a bison and Mr. T, a big badass eagle, a hydra, and a dark/fighting Markie Mark.
My Theory About Mijumaru has Been Jossed. But at least it was Jossed in the craziest way possible. The little water starter whose character design was criticized as the dumbest thing ever turns into a water unicorn thing with an amazing mustache. Zubat, Geodude, and Tentacool are Not Appearing in this Game. Their roles will be taken by three entirely new Pokémon, which is a first. And, in my mind, huge. That said, I am under good authority that we will be cursing whoever thought of the Electric/Flying squirrel...
Three-on-three battles. You knew it was coming, I knew it was coming, and here it is.
I know, but It's going to take me a while to process the "Lost" finale. (Exceedingly minor spoilers in that link.)
So here's a rundown of mysteriously abandoned characters and plotlines from another television series my entire family was in total agreement of and that none of us wanted to end. Supposedly, the producers are working on some feature-length direct-to-DVD sequels. Hopefully, these will be at least be addressed if not fully wrapped up. Mind you, I love the hell out of this series. Unfortunately, this kind of thing kinda comes with the territory when the network decides that they're only going to give you half a season to wrap everything up in your epic fantasy series. Wah. These are in no particular order:
The White Lotus Society They built this up so badly in the final season. This secret society made up mostly of cool older characters did show up in the finale, but their previous mentions in the series were so mysterious. So this isn't technically a dropped plot, but it's one of those things, like the Blue Spirit and Combustion Man and, infamously, Uncle Iroh's jailbreak, that we expected to have a much, much bigger payoff
Toph's Family For a lot of people, this is one of the big ones. So Toph is a character who joins the main cast early in the second season, and she quickly becomes one of the best characters in the show. Thing is, she is a runaway; she went off on her adventures with Aang and company without saying anything to her rich parents. In the *final season* she decides to send a message to her mom to let her know she's alive. This is never again acknowledged. Heck, we don't even know if Toph's family received the message, as it was sent via Sokka's messenger hawk. And since I brought Hawkie up, that leads us naturally to...
Dropped Characters This is a series with loads and loads of characters. Not all of them are going to appear more than once, but there were several who seemed to have been developed enough that they were going to have larger roles later on. Among them are Aang's mentor Guru Pathik, eerie spirit Koh the Face-Stealer, the aforementioned Hawkie, and probably many more that I can't remember right now. But the big one here deserves her own entry:
OK, So What's the Deal With Ursa? She is Zuko and Azula's mother. She has been missing, presumed dead, since before the series began. There is a great deal of evidence that she's still alive in the series, she appears -as a hallucination- in one of the final episodes, and in the very last episode it is revealed that she is indeed alive. It is wildly speculated that the first DTV film will focus on her somehow.
And Finally, What's the Deal With Bosco the Bear? Katara: (reading a newspaper) "The king's having a party tonight for his pet bear!" Aang: "You mean platypus-bear?" Katara: "No, it just says, 'bear.'" Sokka: "Certainly you mean his pet skunk-bear?" Toph: "Or his armadillo-bear?" Aang: "Gopher-bear?" Katara: "Just... 'bear.'" (There is a pregnant pause.) Toph: "This place is weird." That dialogue pretty much speaks for itself. Bosco is the pet bear of the Earth King and he is one of the odd little non sequiters in the show that was treated as kind of a joke for those of us who were paying attention. However, this "joke" has some pretty weird implications for the Avatar universe. All of the non-supernatural animals seen in "Avatar" are weird hybrids, very likely in tribute to "Dungeons and Dragons" (Owlbears anyone?) Taking for granted that the very act of calling a Turtleduck a Turtleduck is a translation convention and normal animals like Bosko are unknown, if Wuzzles/Firffels are normal for the Avatar world then...?
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Totally unrelated, but happy Towel Day!!! Also, here's a nifty interview with Don Hahn via the wonderful /Filmcast. Also via /Film, a preview of illustrations for Josh Cooley's upcoming book Movies R Fun! Oh good lord, they are beautiful ALSO also via /Film, our first look at fully-rendered CGI Wile E. Coyote in Three-Effin-Dee. Dear reader, you can probably guess with 99% accuracy how I feel about this...
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Sketch of the day! Let's consider this a teaser for the next post:
Well, three Anime series and a movie based on one of said series. Here be SPOILERS GALORE! (But no fanart. None. I am not going to draw Jack as a wolf or Locke with an automail arm. No. Just, no.) We all know this is a series that's not going to end with the old "main character looks into an empty room with a sad smile and closes the door" option. I will make two real predictions here: 1) A lot of fans are going to be really, really upset. May want to give them a break that Monday morning. 2) This series finale will inspire essays. Long, long essays. Now, the three best complete Anime series I've seen (thank you, Netflix) had exactly those kinds of endings, so let's try to use them to predict how "Lost" will end. Important terminology note before we begin: Borrowing from "Futurama", the "still stuck on Craphole Island" continuity will be known as Universe A, while the "815 landed safely" continuity will be Universe 1. "Wolf's Rain": Similar in (very) broad strokes to Watership Down, this series ended it's televised run by wrapping up a major conflict, but it didn't conclude the story. This was "fixed" with four episodes that went straight to video, essentially a four-part series finale.The "W.R."-ish Last Episode of "Lost": Every conflict in Universe A is resolved -- but not before everybody dies violently. Jack is the only character left alive, and even then he lies bleeding to death in the bamboo grove. As he slowly passes on (and a ridiculously sad song gradually builds), he gets to watch Craphole Island return to it's pre-crash, pre-Dharma, pre-Jacob and Not-Locke state. But before the credits role, we get a brief look at Universe 1. All the Universe 1 versions of the Candidates, no matter where they are, suddenly sense something. And then Jack starts running... Notes: Change a few of the details and I think this is the most likely ending of all. We are in for a bittersweet as hell ending. "Fullmetal Alchemist": Great series. Probably my overall favorite out of this bunch. Note that we're going with the series ending, and will be ignoring the "Conqueror of Shamballa" movie. Most people do anyway. (Seriously, Fritz Lang is somehow involved. WTF?).The "F.M.A"-ish Last Episode of "Lost": Sawyer is able to destroy NotLocke after that creepy kid (the one who looks like a possibly older Aaron) shows him NotLocke's weakness. Meanwhile, Jack is killed and somehow "wakes up" as Universe 1 Jack. Desmond is conveniently there to explain what's up. In the end, all the Losties in Universe A mentally merge with their Universe 1 counterparts -- and, as Desmond comments, none of them remember a thing about their Craphole Island experiences. And Jack? He's stuck in Universe A, and starts on the search for a way to cross over...Notes: This may be the best integration of the two Universes. And I'd be surprised if Jack gets off the Island. "Neon Genesis Evangelion": For the two or three of you who have never heard of this series, it is essentially to the original English-language dub of "Power Rangers" what "Lost" is to "Gilligan's Island".The "N.G.E."-ish Last Episode of "Lost": Forget the various mysteries of the Island, anything about Universe 1, who or what Jacob and NotLocke are, which characters end up on what side, or anything like that. None of that gets resolved. Instead, Jack gets to talk through his daddy issues with some other people. The end. Notes: You KNOW we're going to hear something about Jack's father one more time for the road. Why not base the whole finale on that and really get it overwith? The main case against this ending: Carlton and Damon probably enjoy breathing. "End of Evangelion": After the uproar over "N.G.E."'s... underwhelming series finale, the producers got together again and made this movie. (It was originally how they had intended to end the series, but time and money were uncooperative.) This new ending was.... ye gods, it was somethin'...The "E.o.E."-ish Last Episode of "Lost": The main conflicts of the show are, thankfully, resolved... and then some angelic beings in the form of Sayid come and hug everyone in both Universes, causing them all to dissolve into Slusho. In the end, Universe A Jack finds himself on a desolate shoreline somewhere doing... something inappropriate... to Universe 1 Locke. Locke compares this situation to getting his period. Notes: Yeah...
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Sketch of the day!
Arrrrrrgh. I was just curious. :(
This will be a Blogger exclusive, as I don't want to stain either online portfolio with this. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Sadbeard McJackwolf:
And since I am the kind of person who thinks that any horrible art thing worth doing is worth doing all the way (and Jackwolf needed some friends), here is The Worst Thing Ever:
This is essentially an amalgamation of all the worst kinds of fanart I've ever seen.
Disclaimer: No, I do not for a second regret joining Deviant Art; I've met lots of cool people there and made some great new contacts. But every so often you run into something like this and...
The thing about DA is this: Think about all the art you did in junior high that you loved at the time, then went back to look at it and said, quote, 😭 . OK? Now consider: back when you and I (presuming we're around the same age, dear reader) were just starting out as artists, our embarrassing-in-hindsight artwork was safely hidden in our Sketchbooks, journals, math notebooks, and so on, where nobody else could see them. These kids have their old shames on display for the whole wide web to see. Dang.
So, anyway, "Lost"!
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I am afraid my brain has turned into mush lately. Therefore, I completely forgot to post this lovely Mother's Day song:
