Until then, here's what I spent my day making:
This is based off a concept that's been sitting around in my imagination since I was a teenager. Yeah, I was a strange person back then. Like anything's changed.
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Award Commentary!
7:17 - I still can't get over this: The Golden Globe nominated "Gnomeo and Juliet".
7:22 - Evan Rachel Wood's dress should be in our upcoming Art Evolved gallery.
7:25 - Walt Disney Pictures presents "John Carter: Based on the Novel 'Nothing in the Title to Do With Princesses We Swear'"!
7:27 - RE: "Big Miracle" First thing I thought of was this, from the very ending of The Animated Films of Don Bluth, courtesy of John Cawley's website:
A SONG OF THE ICE WHALE - This tale... was based on the incident in the arctic when whales were caught in the ice. Countries around the world spent millions of dollars to free the whales before they would perish.
7:35: The imaginary freshmen college girl from 1998 inside Carson Daily is flipping out right now.
7:36: "Yeah, I'm in a genuinely scary-looking Gothic horror film. It's still probably not going to cause as many nightmares as that thing under the bench in 'Deathly Hallows part 2'." - D. Radcliff
7:39 - You don't have to introduce Kathryn McPhee to us, NBC. Please stop doing that.
7:46 - Funny how the prettiest animation goes to commercials about birth control and antidepressants.
7:48 - Well, and the Disney commercials. Derp.
8:06 - And we're off! I am glad I am DVR-ing this whole thing since I missed much of Ricky Gervais' speech. Which, by the way, if anything he says offends you, like deeply, please re-evaluate your life.
8:08 - Man, I need to get my butt in a theater and see "Hugo". And "The Muppets". And "The Artist". And "Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol". Yeesh, I think I may be part of the problem...
8:10 - Christopher Plummer for Best Supporting Actor! This happened while I was typing the above stuff! Now I remember why I hate Live-Blogging! I'm not gonna mention the winners again unless they do something interesting; you can look that up later.
8:13 - Laura Dern better mention "Jurassic Park" somehow...
8:21 - I maintain that the Globes are the most fun awards to watch. There are technical mistakes like crazy and EVERYONE IS FED LOTS OF WINE. (My poison of choice for tonight. Oh, hey Kate Winslet won something!)
8:38 - If you are surprised that "Game of Thrones" didn't win, welcome to being a fantastic fiction fan, kid. It never gets any easier.
8:45 - Adam your music is bad and you should feel bad! Seriously, I cannot wait to only have to hear Maroon 5 on "Back to the Zilches Friday Night".
8:47 - Even Leo thinks "The Artist"'s composer is the cutest thing.
8:48 - Seriously, I can't let it go: THE GOLDEN GLOBE NOMINATED "GNOMEO AND JULIET"!?!
8:50 - And as a nice anticlimax of sorts, Madonna won. Have no idea for what movie, though.
8:51 - Wait... wait, so Madonna MADE a movie?!? Well, on behalf of every humoridian from the era of "Shanghai Surprise" and other not-good movies involving Madonna, I say (ahem) HOLY SH*T, AN AWARD-WINNING MADONNA MOVIE!?!
9:00 - Well, thanks, Seth, you just made things way more awkward than they were before. Also, "My Week With Marilyn" is a comedy.
9:10 - Thanks to the Magic of DVR, I can not miss whatever it is that I just missed right now!
9:12 -
(But is it me or did the announcer seriously mispronounce the name of the show and the character?)
9:16 - Congrats, editor, on making "Moneyball" look interesting. Now brace yourselves, here comes the introduction for Animated Film...
9:18 - And the Motion-Captured TinTin for the WinWin. How badly do you think the guys at Cartoon Brew are crapping themselves right now?
9:23 - D'oh, forgot I could fast-forward the commercials!
9:27 - OK, that was adorable.
9:27 - Woah, actors from genre shows are winning stuff tonight! Young fantastic fiction fans, enjoy this.
9:29 - Surreal IRL Discussion of the Night (so far): My dad trying to convince me that when the announcer said that Jessica Lange won a Golden Globe for "King Kong", they actually did mean the Dino DeLaurentas 1970's monstrosity. When I am Queen, I will perform an Inception on everyone so that when they are about to whine about how they hate the Peter Jackson version, the shower scene from 70s!King Kong plays on an endless loop in their heads.
9:31 - Oh shizz, Madonna just Goth-served Ricky!
9:39 - WAAAAAY-after-the-fact cherring over Clair Danes winning for "My So-Called Life". I need to revisit that series.
9:40 - I just realized that I should have based Victoria the Deinonychus Angel's... "wings"... after Madonna's...
9:41 - So now that "Bridesmaids" exists, can we stop seeing everyone in Hollywood being so surprised when it turns out that women like to go to movies with more than three female lead characters? Because I swear I started seeing this as a kid when "Waiting to Exhale" was in theaters and it should have ended there.
9:47 - Confession: Speaking of movies with more than three female lead characters. I have not seen "The Help" in it's entirety. I have only seen the sh*t pie scene. That was enough for me.
9:55 - And now, many kind words about Morgan Freeman. I've nothing sarcastic to say about this.
10:03 - Incidentally, "RED" is a pretty damn good movie if you've missed it.
10:04 - Also, you can tell if a new acquaintance is worth a damn if they start weeping openly if you show them a clip from "March of the Penguins". If they don't, forget 'em.
10:10 - Have to admit, "John Carter" looks pretty badass. I'm actually rooting for it not to bomb.
10:13 - Out-loud "D'aaaaaaw"-ing at Scorscese's win, Leo's reaction, and the well-deserved Brian Selznic shout-out.
10:17 - Pretty sure at this point that the only people who'd classify "Glee" as a comedy are people who have never watched an entire season of the show.
10:24 - Disconcerting Phrase of the Night: "From the UPCOMING film, 'Total Recall'!"
10:36 - Repeat: this is why this is the Best Awards Show.
10:38 - Every endangered species of bird just went "what" at Merryl's mixed metaphor. And Merryl's Mixed Metaphor is a good name for a band.
10:40 - Calling it now: "the Artist" is going to be this year's "The King's Speech". But awww, Uggie!
11:00 - Just realized that "Tree of Life" was nominated for nothing at all. Huh.
