Wednesday, May 13, 2015

It Really Was Better When I Was Your Age. Deal With It. Let's Kill, Refurb, Marry Extinct Attractions!



This is going to be an interesting one, because I'm not quite sure what the age-range of the bloggers who participate in Kill, Refurb, Marry is.  Bringing up extinct attractions will inevitably date many of us.  Let's get right into it.

Kill: "Honey, I Blew Your Eardrums Out Shrunk the Audience" - At first, I thought the "Kill" section here seems a little strange.  "Extinct attractions are already dead, by definition, and anyway MAH NOSTALGIA!  EVERYTHING WAS BETTER WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE!  FACT!"

Then I remembered that the attraction that turned me off the "Audience Abuse" subgenre of 4D shows forever, "Honey, I Shrunk the Audience", was a thing and thought, "Oh, no, nevermind.  That thing can go right straight to hell."

Refurb (more like "reinstate"): "The Magic of Disney Animation" But With Actual Animators Animating Things Again - In the original version of this attraction, you watched a short, very funny film that explained how animation is created and then got to walk above the heads of animators working on films.  I can't express how awesome this was.

In the current version, you stand in line to meet costumed versions of the characters standing in the very same places the animators used to work and get to watch the closest thing a real theme park has come to the "Mr. DNA" movie in "Jurassic Park". Also, I got yelled at for wanting to walk down a corridor that had actual animation concept art displayed on the walls.  Yeah.

Marry: "Horizons" - Was there any doubt?

I'll be honest.  I'm still a little angry that I'm not currently living in an undersea building with a sea lion buddy.  I WAS PROMISED UNDERSEA BUILDINGS AND SEA LION BUDDIES!  ALSO, SPACE-HOTELS!

Then again, I am able to wish my relatives Happy Birthday instantly with time and space being no problem.  It's not as fun as Horizons made it look though.

Next Time: Resort Pools! The big surprise here would be if anyone chooses anything other than Stormalong Bay to marry.

Important Note: I was unaware that the date for this entry had been pushed forward to June.  Oh well, here it is early.

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Sketch of the Day: Yi qi yi qi yi qi!!!

4.29 - Meet Yi qi!

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