Thursday, May 17, 2012

"No. Unless You Count Birds." - Let's Finish Reading _If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today_!

Ay-yi-yi, we're almost done!

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

Here's that other strange-looking Triceratops I promised way back in the beginning.

The whole final section of the book may actually be the most brain-hurting.  It purpotes to be a "Question and Answer" section that intends to show some genuine non-speculative science in this otherwise very silly book. Well...

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

First off, that's a metaphysical question I never thought I'd see. Secondly, "Mammals are only here because there are no dinosaurs.  In the Age of Dinosaurs mammals were small... new meat-eating animals evolved -- first into giant flightless birds, and then carnivorous mammals."

So much wrong in one little rectangle of text, it boggles the mind.  And here is another unsuspecting human who looks like he was blissfully unaware of what they were going to use his photo for.

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

But then the answer is "Yes" isn't it? Anyway, at least Dixon is nice enough to elaborate on this. Kinda:

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

Yeah.

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

That's downright philosophical.  And what do people have against chickens anyway?

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

"I've always wanted to ride a Chocobo!"

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

Yeah, so who else has ever heard of this "Vivaporous Pachycephalosaurs" theory? I've only ever heard of live-birthing sauropods and that was long enough ago to feel like a childhood fever dream. Elsewhere, Dixon notes that since their eggs are always in pairs, a female Troodon must have had a pair of "egg tubes" in her body where modern birds only have one, which, if true, is news to me.

And then, there's this:

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

I feel Dixon stopped just short of screaming, "'Jurassic Park 3' is stupid, stop even acknowledging it!"  This is part of a brief listing of science fiction involving dinosaurs in modern times that mentions "Jurassic Park", of course, and The Lost World and Journey to the Center of the Earth and Pellucidar...  but NOT The New Dinosaurs.  Huh.

Anyway, it's time to touch base with an old friend:

"If Dinosaurs Were Alive Today"

Syntarsus sans Mohawk! Man, he looks strange without it.

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Sketch of the Day!

5.1.12 - Deinocheirus is Sick of This S***