The Triumphant Return of Fird and the Firffels!

Look at what came in the mail last week!

Okay, this might take some explanation, especially if you're new to the blog.

Way back in the first year, one of the most popular posts I wrote mentioned the Firffels and my assumed history of the toy line. Many comments suggested I was very wrong about the Fiffels and that they had a much more interesting history. I made a follow-up post which itself became very popular. Sadly, it didn't look like there was any more to learn about the Firffels, since the book that introduced the characters, Whoever Heard of a Fird, was long out of print and what copies popped up as available were very expensive.

Well, a few weeks ago, I received the following email:

Hi there.

I was looking at your blog. My name is Shann Hurst, I'm an illustrator. I thought you might be interested to know that I've been working with Othello Bach and we're re-releasing "Whoever Heard Of A Fird?" Actually it's out and on sale now. Anyway, It's something we've really put a lot of work into and we're really excited about how it's turning out. If you have time, you're invited to look at the official website: www.whoeverheardofafird.com

Let me know how you like it.

Shann Hurst

www.wishenginestudio.com

I thanked Shann Hurst and ordered the book right away.  It took a while to arrive, which implies that it must be pretty popular and there's a lot of nostalgia for these characters.

And now that I've just finally read the book, I can see why.  The message is simple: be yourself.  But everything else in the book is so unusual and fun that the moral doesn't feel like a pill.

First off, obviously, the characters are all delightfully bizarre.  Boogie monsters, Panducks, Kangaroctopi, it's clear that Othello Bach had a lot of fun coming up with these creatures and Shann Hurst must have had a lot of fun drawing them.  Hurst's style itself is very unusual and almost surreal, and it fits the menagerie of friendly freaks.

Othello's writing is highly unique as well.  The book is much more text-heavy than I thought it would be, but it never feels bloated.  A lot of text is given over to poems and songs, some of which get downright philosophical.  And some of them are just fun.



My prediction is that kids -especially weird kids- are going to embrace this new edition of Whoever Heard of a Fird.  Hopefully, it'll renew interest in Othello Bach's characters.

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Sketch of the Day

The Mystery of the Firffels Deepens! But Not By a Whole Lot.

When I rescued this old essay from my sunken Geocities website, I didn't expect it to get the reaction it got. In particular, I've been getting a lot of "OMG, THAT'S what those not-Wuzzle things were called! Thank you for helping me not go insane!"

In the older post, I described the Firffels rather unfairly as "The Wuzzles Who Didn't Make It", and assumed that "Remco probably saw the mint that Disney made with their cute little spliced furballs and said, 'WAH! Me TOO!!!'"

It seems I was wrong in assuming this. Maybe.

I got a couple of Anonymous posters stating that the Firffels actually predate the Wuzzles. I can believe this; it's fairly well-known that the Go-Bots were released long before the Transformers and it's not hard to see who won that duel. Further, one poster claimed that Michael Eisner saw the Firffels at some point, and liked the concept enough to do his own version. These wound up being much more successful because he had The Power of Disney on his side.

I can kinda see that happening. Thing is, I seem to recall seeing the Firffels commercials at around the same time Wuzzles cartoon was just getting popular. I hate to be like this, but it'd be nice to see some hard evidence that Eisner was aware of Firffels at all before we accuse him of stealing the idea...

I just kinda ran to Michael Eisner's defense and now I feel dirty. O.O

I did, however, have to admit that there is some reason to agree that Firffels predate Wuzzles by at least a few years. There's an old picture book featuring the Firffel characters; and I only knew about that thanks to a comment in TV Tropes. Then a nice poster called Venusboi79 provided some links. They don't quite answer all my questions about these weird characters, but they do deepen my curiosity.

The first link took me to the official website of the woman who created the Firffels characters, Othello Bach. (I still need to experiment with calling myself Trysch just to see what happens.) Her site is very Flash-heavy and a bit confusing, but if you hit "Books" and then "Collectibles", you'll find yourself at a page with a book entitled Whoever Heard of a Fird? Clicking the cover enlarges the picture and... that's it. (Well, there's also an arrow taking you to the book's Amazon page and the asking price made my eyes bleed, so I can't follow that thread.)

Far, far more interesting is the film clip under the book cover. Unfortunately, embedding is disabled. It's well worth watching though because it is fascinating (it's very clearly designed for buyers). I also found this commercial:



Venus also directed me to good old Ghost of the Doll, a website that has saved my rear end many times in the ebaying department. There's no entry on the Firffels, but there is a very extensive message board thread with loads and loads of pictures.  

Looks like I remembered everyone from the toys (Fird, Dicken, Butterfrog, and Burtle) except Shamel (sheep + camel. We don't need to do this on the planet I live on because Llamas exist.) According to TV Tropes, the books also include a Woose (worm/goose and according to the illustration showing him at Ghost of the Doll, well up there with the Slobber and the Wyrm as the Saddest Imaginary Animal Ever), Blizard (bird/lizard), Girouse (giraffe/mouse), Snog (snail/hog), Dryder (dragon/spider - WTF?), and the not-as-horrifying-as-it-sounds Hyenant (hyena/ant). But there's also the truly horrifying Elephunky (elephant/gorilla).  It's those giant arms. And the man-boobs.

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Sketchadaday! Speaking of imaginary animal franchises...



This hasn't been Jossed yet, has it?

Highly Dubious and/or Forgotten 80's Toys

Another old LaGremlin Land post that would have been lost to the Aether later this year. Originally posted 10/20/05.

First, you may have noticed that most of the cartoons and toys of the 80's followed this formula: (1) Be colorful; (2) Be Sci-Fi and/or Fantasy-themed; (3) Make very, VERY little sense.
 
A little research proved that some 80's toys have since faded into obscurity. I was doing a Google search for "the Wuzzles", and I was hoping to find some other opinions and information and pictures and stuff. Well, I found a picture in some little auction website where a guy was selling three Wuzzles… and three Firffels.
 
I jumped up out of my chair screaming, "THAT'S what they were called!?!" And I did my wee little Happy Dance! And I reset my Google search to find more Firffel information…
All I got was more auction sites. Nobody remembered these things! Curiosity about Firffels led me to searching for the BeMores. Then the Jumbles. Nothing! Nobody remembers these completely insane 80's toys!
 
Well, I remember them, and I know I'm not insane, even though these descriptions might seem too nutty to be for real. So here's my little tribute to three toy lines that nobody shows love for anymore. All of these toys were plush stuffed animals, they each had a story to go along with them, and they were each sold in a now-defunct Bradlees department store in Quincy Point, as I recall. Pictures will be provided whenever they are available. Note that this information is based largely on my unreliable and fuzzy memory.
 

(Picture from ebay.) These are the guys that inspired this article. One of the auction sites I found them for sale at lovingly described the Firffels as "Wuzzle Rip-offs". That sums up their likely genesis, I'll bet. Remco probably saw the mint that Disney made with their cute little genetically mutated furballs and said, "WAH! Me TOO!!!"
 
Firffels could be renamed "The Wuzzles Who Didn't Make It". Here is a list of the characters I can remember:
Burtle = Half Bear, Half Turtle
Butterfrog = Half Butterfly, Half Frog
Fird = Half Fish, Half Duck (Woah, Remco can dodge bullets…)
Dicken = Half Dog, Half Chicken (Or not.)
 
Take a look at that there lineup and you see why this didn't catch on. Splice together a monkey and a rhino and you are hardcore. A dog crossed with a chicken is stupid and reeks of poo. More importantly, this toy line probably failed because kids aren’t stupid. They can tell when they're being had.

 

(Picture from my own Bemore.) "See a BeMore, well it can be MORE! / See a BeMore, well it can be MORE! / See a BeMore, well it can be MORE! / I love my BeMore dinosaur!"
 
Obviously the result of a fever dream, BeMores were essentially Transformers for girls. Make a stuffed animal, but make it one that, through the magic of oddly placed pockets and Velcro flaps, can transform into something almost but not quite entirely different. Also, throw dinosaurs into the mix. Dinosaurs kick ass. Everybody loves them.
 
I think there were a grand total of three BeMore characters. One was a sauropod that turned into - a magical dragon! Another was a ceratopsian that transformed into - a magical dragon! And the last one, the fellow pictured here, was a carnosaur who transforms into - a bunny rabbit!
 
Nope, just kidding. He turns into a magical dragon also! Thank you BeMores for supporting the Legendary Creatures = Misinterpreted Fossils theory, better known as the We Don't Think People are Capable of Using Their Imaginations theory. (I feel bad for Gryphons.)
 
Perhaps the most amusing thing about these toys was the fact that they had stolen their names from some My Little Ponies. I think one was called Gusty and another might have been called Heart Throb. I think we should stop right there and show you more fun things to do with Velcro that will mess with kids' heads.
Sadly, I couldn't find a picture, but our next toy collection is the Jumbles!
 
Now this one is clearly the work of a madman. Follow this story.
 
Once upon a time, some cute stuffed animals were outside playing and having a fun party. But then an accident happened. Based upon the results, the accident might have involved the local Ninja clan having a demonstration on proper sword and throwing-star safety. My memory's a bit fuzzy on this point. 
 
Anyway, afterwards, all the little stuffed animals were lying in pieces on the ground. The Ninjas hastily put them all back together using the secret long lost Velcro Jutsu, but got everyone -wait for it- JUMBLED! And from then on, the stuffed animals, who now proudly called themselves Jumbles, could exchange their body parts with one-another through the magic of Velcro!
 
W-h-a-a-a-a-a-a-t???
 
Yes, what you got in your box was a stuffed animal whose limbs had all been hacked off and attached with Velcro. So you and your sister, who presumably got a different Jumble character, could have hours and hours of fun switching limbs with each other.
 
I would give anything within reason to see a cartoon based upon this concept. Can you imagine how wickedly great it would be?

DANNY DACHSHUND - "Dude, the basketball tournament is this weekend! I need to borrow your legs!"
GERRY GIRAFFE - "No way. Besides, I'm already loaning them to Benny the Bass."
BENNY BASS - (Weeping with joy) "I can walk! Listen! I CAN WALK!!!"

Oh yes, I would watch the hell out of that cartoon. Too bad it doesn't exist. 
 
Well, I hope you enjoyed these weird toys. And I can only hope that somebody out there is doing their Happy Dance because of this. That would be great.